Disclaimer: The following statement is written by a crazed Sharks hockey fan under the impression that star d-man, Dan Boyle, his one and only man crush, will be on the ice tonight vs. Carolina. If he is not, the following post need not and should not apply. All right reserved. Not property of the NHL, AHL, ECHL or Marcel Goc’s blog….

The Sharks are going to bust out like Jessica Simpson at the Hometown Buffet tonight. Five goals with a multi-point game from Dan Boyle. Check. A dazed and confused Carolina team wishing the charter plane for Phoenix left at 7:35pm. Check. A face full of ribs and bbq sauce for J-Simp. Yeesh. Check please.

I love the Sharks to break out tonight after a string of rather dull wins and a tough loss to the Blackhawks on Saturday. They’ve had a long time to think it over and this coaching staff does not like losing and I’m sure made that clear this week to the players. This is a great shot for the team to leave for the most brutal stretch of games they have all season on a extreme positive, a thorough trouncing of an average opponent. This type of game the Sharks thrive in and I don’t see Carolina having the goaltending to pull off a miracle here.

Three things happen tonight.
1: A final score of Sharks 5 Canes 1
2: Dan Boyle has two + points tonight in his return behind the wheel of the Stanley Cup machine.
3: Claude Lemieux will score his first goal as a Shark. Tonight.

Three things that won’t happen tonight.
1: Jody Shelley will not fight anyone. Carolina has the 2nd least fighting majors in the NHL and are the least penalized team in the NHL. Wussies.
2: Rod Brind’Amour will not play. He has been sent home with an undisclosed “prune overdose”.
3: I will eat a hot dog and somewhere…so will Jessica Simpson.

GO SHARKS! Our latest podcast here.