In their infinite wisdom, the NHL has decided to hold the All-Star game and skills competitions on a Tuesday and Wednesday, the time when everyone is thinking about hockey. I’m sure the skills competition will run neck-and-neck with American Idol in the ratings. And by ‘neck-and-neck’, I mean, ‘the neck of a gnat vs the neck of a giraffe’.

And I like the All-Star game. I hate basketball, so the NBA All-Star game is out. Baseball’s All-Star game is lame, because the commisioner attached some ginned-up consequences to it. And the Pro Bowl is after the season is over, so who cares about that? The NHL All-Star game is purposefully not serious. Sure, wimps like Scott Niedermayer won’t show up because they’re ‘hurt’ or whatever, but it’s really not a big drain on one’s constitution. You skate around with some buddies, no one hits anybody else, and you take a few shots.

Ok, so the game is kinda like a family Thanksgiving touch football game on ice, without all the contact. Which is why the skills competition is the better event. As a hockey player myself, I definitely appreciate the skills shown in a regular season game, but I like to see the nuts and bolts of stuff. How fast can you shoot? How are you at saving breakaways? Plus, you get to see all the players trash talk each other, which is pretty fun.

The word is that Cheech, Marleau, and Joe will be on the same line during the game itself, so I’ll be tuning in for that. Maybe we’ll see something that rivals Owen Nolan’s called shot, my favorite All-Star moment ever.